Yes, yes. I know that drumming on Guitar Hero: World Tour is nothing like drumming on a real kit, but hot diggety was that fun! I honestly would have thought that I would have liked singing the best, but nope. For me it was pounding the crap out of drums, working my way up from beginner to easy. (Shut up. I'm new at these sorts of games. I avoided them much for the same reasons I avoided DDR.)

Al, babe, seriously the best impulse buy we've done so far! Half of my housemates crawled out of their room to play as well, and were for the better part of the night. I honestly don't think we've done such wholesome group activity like that in a while.

The reason why I'm writing this right now instead of playing? It's 7:30 in the morning and people are asleep. Bah! I want to drum again! Even though my arms were dead and felt like they were falling out I'd groan, then lift my head and say "hey, let's play another set." Heh heh.

Sometimes I'm more machine than woman, I swear.

I think I now have a vaguely sexual fetish for chaste, pure-hearted, muscular, blonde Edwardian lesbians wearing men's clothing. (The mask, highwayman's hat and cutlass only add to the effect.) A little specific, perhaps? Fantastical to boot. All I know is that Lionheart is haunting my dreams now...

Damn it! I thought I was over having crushes on fictional characters! Oh well. Maybe it just means that it's time I start writing Harley/Batgirl femmeslash again. It's not like I have anything else on the boiler... like Shimmer or something.

Today on Facebook I posted a rather well-known quote regarding the nature of God by the Greek philosopher Epicurus in my status bar. Almost immediately my cousin, Rachel, a funny, sharp and all around wonderful chickie (as well as a born-again Christian) conceded that I had an interesting point and asked why I am not a Christian.

Sitting across my bed from me my boyfriend (and soon to be fiance *angry poke*) zootyzoot asked "isn't the question more why should you be a Christian?"

Both are fair questions. I was raised in a family of Christians, all of whom are very deeply married to their beliefs. Coming from the home that I did it seemed that becoming a Christian and being a "great man of God" (as my grandmother chronically professed I would be) was an inevitability, but in true black sheep fashion I veered away from that and today I profess to be an "agnostic quantum theist."

( Cut for religion talk. WARNING: just in case some find this disturbing. )

So I went and saw Terminator: Salvation last night. Honestly, I was going in with high hopes. Christian Bale, Helena Bonham Carter, for some reason these names lead me to think that perhaps I'm going to watch a very indepth film with a lot of time-travelish twists a la T2 or the Sarah Connor Chronicles (both of which I love, btw.) Instead there was a lot of grunting, a lot of coincidence and a sense of "not sure if want."

Oh well. What can you do?

Though the thing that really bothered me about Terminator: Salvation was the lighting. Something about it was off, I mean REALLY off. It was ultimately very distracting and detracted from the overall enjoyability of the film. I hope that someone brought the issue up with the director so that they could have that lighting guy fired.

This Terminator fangirl gives it three stars because she likes watching things go 'BOOM!'

The gods of fanfiction are calling to me, and yay, I will reluctantly answer. My brain can never stop processing ideas. Seriously, I lose so much sleep this way.

It's been haunting me for days now: the prospect of writing a Doctor Who/Star Trek crossover. Actually, I'm thinking about writing three. In all likelihood there's probably going to be several written by fans in the wake of the new film, but deep down I'm a TNG fangirl at heart.

So I've been thinking about it and to be perfectly honest I'm spoiled for choice. So many ideas, so little time!

The first is the 8th Doctor with Charlie and K'rizz investigating a time anomaly in the past while the Enterprise-D encounters and investigates a similar anomaly in their present. This of course brings them together, and in typical TNG fangirl fashion I'm going to draw in Q somehow. (I've been watching Q episodes lately and I'm dying to write him.)

Secondly there's the 10th Doctor and Rose on DS9 seeking out Quark to buy black market spare parts for the TARDIS. However Odo had taken the form of a bar stool, grabbed the Doctor and had him locked up. Of course this is right on time for a Dalek invasion. The Daleks steal the Bajouran Orb of Healing and disappear. Where? To the mirror universe where the Daleks serve at the whim of the Intendant (evil Kira) and use the orb to cure her of a deadly poison that would have done her in. The Doctor discovers why the Daleks are there, battle of wits, rah rah rah... much fun.

A quick sample of what I had in mind.

INTENDANT: Seize the terrans!
DOCTOR: Woah woah woah woah! I'm not a terran. Go on, take a look. Two hearts, see?
*they check him with tricorder scans*
INTENDANT: Very well. You may not be terran, but your companion is. Take her to the ore processing plant!
DOCTOR: Ahm, actually, I'd rather you not. You see she's a family pet and I couldn't bear to part with her.
INTENDANT: Pet?
ROSE: *incredulous* PET!?
INTENDANT: Do you have papers?
*The Doctor flashes some psychic paper*
INTENDANT: Very well then.
ROSE: *whispers* We'll talk about this later.

Lots and lots of fun! (Plus Dax recognizing the Doctor as a lecturer from her academy days.)

Thirdly, finally, the Doctor (10) and Donna wind up inside an asteroid within the gamma quadrant. Inside is what remains Gallifreyan matrix. On the outside the USS Voyager duelling with a trio of borg cube ships. This, the Doctor being taken prisoner by Starfleet... again... and Donna making lots of "I love a man in uniform" cracks at Tom Paris, and you have yourself another crossover!

Ugh. My brain is made of fanfiction soup tonight. TOO MUCH CHOICE! Decisions, decisions, decisions. (I just needed to air this somewhere to keep my inner geek from drowning. Hopefully after this I can look back more objectively.)

So far I've found 3 TNG, 2 Voyager and 1 DS9 fics online crossing with Doctor Who, all on fanfiction.net. If anyone could point me at some more it would be greatly appreciated.

[/fake promo]

What a week, what a week. My headspace is absolutely buzzing and I haven't updated this journal in a really long time. I should really make a habit of writing more often.

There's been a lot of writings to do with Shimmer, mostly due to the fact that I'm co-writing a crossover with another serial, the Legion of Nothing by Jim Zoetewey. I am to say the least incredibly excited to be pulling something like this together, especially considering that I'm a sucker for crossovers. (Back in the days I used to write fanfic I pretty much exclusively wrote crossovers.)

( Shimmer, Star Trek, the Bible, Al )

So thanks to something caught on a friend's LJ I've decided on a whim to take a request and write a piece of post-apocalyptic fan fiction as specified by the rules here at apocalyptothon . It should be a blast! Which would in turn end the world and all human life, leaving the survivors to crawl through the wreckage and scrounge for food, medicine, bullets and other supplies...

I've made a couple of requests for Colbert Report fic which I sincerely hope someone takes. Oh, the hilarity!

Well, tomorrow I head off to Supanova to man the Wibbly Press table and whore my wares to thousands upon thousands of conventioneers. It's something of a foreboding task for a recovering agoraphobic like myself, but I'm confident that I'll get through it without a scratch! (Hell, if that guy who looked like me could do it, then so can I!)

Vaguely I fear running into people I haven't spoken with in a year, namely a few former friends who I silently fell out with for a reason that eludes me. Not friendships I'm bothered with fixing, I'll admit, but I worry that with their arrival that drama will inevitably follow. Even worse: what if somebody from way back points and goes "hey, aren't you Opera Guy/Sparta Guy?" *shudder*

Whatever. It might serve as a pleasant distraction from everything else bothering me, namely the red tape that comes with helping Al with his travel arrangements. Even though I've (hopefully) planned for every contingiency I still find myself with this lingering dread thinking 'what if they don't approve his visa?' It's not a thought that sits well with me, even though that's not likely. All I know is that if anything happened... maybe I've hinged too much on this (or maybe I'm just that much in love. Go figure.)

Finally, finally, FINALLY! New Shimmer relaunches next week after a long delay! I'll be updating twice a week on mondays and fridays, and will be sure to post links here on LJ.

That's all from me. Maybe I should get some rest. I can still hear Al's voice telling me "you need an early night, babe" but I've been spoiled. I can't fall asleep without hearing his voice anymore. Damn him. (That's okay. My revenge is that he can't sleep without hearing mine, either. I'll try my best to restrain myself and not gush about how adorable he is, though I fear I may be too late.)

Ugh... Randi, you're such a sap.

Honestly, my thoughts haven't been in this country for months. Ever since being introduced to this possible reality of life in another country, and what's more a country that I've always had a strange admiration for (even though some people might say I'm crazy for it) there's been little else I can focus on.

October can't be close enough, and yet it can't be far enough away. Am I crazy!? What the hell am I doing!? Is this even real!? My life over the course of the last two years has taken a turn for the unbelievable... but I don't want to go back. Scary and as mind-blowing as it is I know I'm going to be disappointed if I listen to the panic.

For now I guess all I can do is prepare so that I'm not taken off-guard. Still, reading through all of this visa and green card information at midnight is just going to send my brain into a spin...

Maybe I need sleep. I'll probably dream of stars and stripes (and... well, you know who, who really I should thank for making all of this possible. (Thank you, baby! Love you!))

Night, all!

So he says to me "babe, you should post on LJ. You haven't posted in like... ten years."

Okay, okay, fine, I'm posting, rawr, here I am writing something like I've meant to, but it just hasn't been coming lately. A lot's been happening and inspiration is running dry.

So, babe, I promise one day that I'll write something and give you yet another insight into all things Randi, k? :P

Moving day tomorrow. Countless boxes packed, still much to do.

Humidity bites like mouth of a dog. Muscles aching, enthusiasm fading. Process frustrating. Struggle to keep from exploding at earliest convenient target.

Hrmmm.

Will be away from internet for three days. Know that I'll starve like a junkie. Will look to screen and beg for service. Screen will look down and whisper "page not found."

(Can you tell what I've been reading?)

Usually I spend most of my time banging away at Shimmer as I try to make it even better, but a majority of the comments I receive about my writing are about Good Kitty Bad. Most of them seem to consist of a universal line of thinking that basically goes "WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO WRITE MORE!?"

Alright, people. Fine. I cave. I'll write more. I'm halfway through the first chapter and will post it on LJ when it's completed. (I know I sound frustrated, but it's actually come as a refreshing change, but I'm not giving up Shimmer for it. No way, no how.)

In part this is my gift to sakenichi. Yes, Jules, I'm writing Good Kitty Bad mostly for you. All of your LJ entries lately say depressed, and you are for good reason all things considered, and while there's not much I can say I figured 'hey, at least I can do this' and hope you smile a little because of it.

I hope the rest of you enjoy it too. You all nagged me for it, so you probably will. :P

For those of you interested I've decided to post the first part of the new Shimmer rewrite. It's not been announced on Wibbly yet, and I swear I'll get around to that sometime.

It's been a lot of hard work starting again from scratch, and for the most part I hope it pays off. I don't know if it's better than the original or not, but I do know that this version is going to be a lot cleaner and a lot more coherent.

Think I should keep posting these on LJ too? Or maybe I could just link them from Wibbly. That is, once they reach Wibbly...

Anyway, for your reading pleasure, my comic book opus in prose form. Ladies, gentlemen, and distinguished others, I give you Shimmer #01...

EDIT: Please keep in mind that I may choose to scrap this new version entirely, but for the sake of my sanity let's hope not.

 

( All that Glimmers (Part 1) )

Nirvana, Aneurysm.

My lyric: "She keeps a perfect stain in my heart."
Real lyric: "She keeps it pumpin' straight to my heart."

My version kinda sucked...

Either Jesus or Megatron/Galvatron: perhaps a combination of the two. I wish that were a joke answer.

About a year ago I started writing a web serial called Shimmer. The premise was rather ambitious at best, needless complicated at the worst:

Kaira Cade and her brother Justin were superheroes, Glimmer Girl and Flashbolt. Justin, being the adventurous type, was the first to put on tights and a mask, while Kaira being the overprotective big sister that she was did the same for no other reason than to watch his back. Eventually, there was an accident, the two switched bodies, had to live each other's lives, then Justin was killed and Kaira was forced to spend the rest of her life as him. After a long, angsty grieving period she decided that if she wanted anything of her old life back she'd have to do it the hard way, with hormones, surgery, etc.

Part of the reasoning behind this was to tell the story of a cis person going through a semi-realistic trans experience, but I doubt it was anything like that to begin with. I got lost, the plot became too muddy, and after fleshing out the verse I found that I loved it, but I couldn't continue. Why? Because I hated my protagonist the way she was.

So I've decided to start over and make things simpler. I'm getting rid of the body-swap angle to start with. That's just... well, a little bit shit. Now it's probably just going to be about a trans teenager using her powers to escape her dreaded everyday male life into a superheroic female one that she prefers. Last I checked that still hadn't been done in the mainstream comic book worlds, so for as much as I can be I'm being original.

*raises my glass* Here's to Shimmer Mk II!

Just a little something I felt like sharing with people. It's going into print, so I figured that it wouldn't hurt to make it public.

What follows is the afterword to the first volume of my web serial, Shimmer. Mostly it's me rambling about gender politics in regards to the most serious literary undertaking I've ever committed myself to.

Also, special points to zootyzoot  for bringing a lot of things to light for me. (Love you, baby.)

So, without further ado, the afterword:

* * * *

One day, it all hit me like a ton of bricks.

"Baby, you know I love Shimmer," said my boyfriend as he adjusted his headset, "but your main character is an idiot."

For a moment I wondered, what was he talking about? It could have been because Kaira Cade felt the compulsion to put on tights and get schooled by supervillains, a silly exercise in it's own right but also the unquestionable basis for a superhero story. On the other hand it could be because of Kaira herself, struggling quietly with her new body and more subtly with bigotry she didn't even know she had.

( Cut for length and reflection )

I had a very strange dream last night that my darling zootyzoot had left me quite jealous when he ran off to become the sidekick of a superhero named 'Armadillo Rabbit.'

"The nerve of him!" I cried. "What kind of a superhero name is 'Armadillo Rabbit' anyway? Besides, all he does is roll around and let bullets bounce off of him! How stupid is that?"

All the while I was watching Armadillo Rabbit on TV, curled up in a hard ball and rolling about while his rabbit ears poked out of the top. What's more is that he seemed to have some control of the direction of the bullets ricocheting off of him, and managed to take out a dozen bank robbers.

As much as I hated to admit it I was impressed. Was still kind of jealous, though. I mean, the little bugger stole my boyfriend so they could fight crime together. Grrr. Didn't anybody stop and think that maybe I wanted to fight crime too?

So I'd spent a great deal of the afternoon musing about what a silly name 'Armadillo Rabbit' is when I realized, how is it any crazier than 'Batman' or 'Spider-Man'? Surely if a cat were to dress up as a bat they'd be 'Bat-Cat' or if a pig dressed up as a spider they'd be 'the Amazing Spider-Pig'! Why can't an anthropomorphized rabbit dress up as an armadillo and become 'Armadillo Rabbit'?

I'm even half considering introducing him into the Shimmer canon.

And Al? No, you may not run off and become his sidekick. I forbid it. The Flaming Admiral I can understand, but that's where I draw the line.

Continuing on from the meme passed on by aesmael ...

PREVIOUSLY:

*cue dramatic music*

"As" "what" "the" "if" "said" "when" "first" "kismet" "why?"

And now, the fourth and fifth gripping installment of the happiness meme:

No points for guessing, but I've still been talking to zootyzoot  every day. I can't help it! He's a part of my life now and I wouldn't have it any other way! Besides, a day just doesn't feel right without talking to him for at least a few hours.

He makes me very happy, just by existing, and even though I worry about him killing his sleeping pattern just because he wants to keep talking (and secretly I want him to as well) and get frustrated, I wouldn't change it. Somehow the way he does it is remarkably sweet.

Ugh! Yeah, I've fallen for him. He can do no wrong, my hero, etc.

Yesterday I was taken out by Spare Mum (aka Lucian's Mum, aka Margaret) to go shopping for my Christmas present. Lip gloss, eye shadow and lots and lots of purple. It's not often I do something that girly, but it was hella-fun. (I'm bringing hella back. I'm sure somebody will take issue with this.)

While I don't have much to say about that, I was absolutely blown away by the fact that I spent so much time away from home in places I've never been, some of which were very, very crowded, and my anxiety only spiked once. There was some laughter somewhere as I was walking, and I'm pretty sure it wasn't at me, but I was nervous all the same and managed to quell it.

So, yeah, the therapy is working! I'm slowly getting better!

Also, today I got a phone call from my Aunty Maree inviting me over for Christmas. The thought in and of itself of spending time with the born again half of my family terrifies me somewhat, but I know they're not the same kind of people my father is (eg. they have hearts and souls.) While I'm sure there will be some conflict over gender stuff, and I will be scared of some of the questions, I'm sure they'll be nice and I'll get out of it alive.

Scary as it is, I'm glad that I've committed to it. Christmas with my family... at least my father won't be there. He's at odds with my uncle and while in the past I've not taken sides I've decided to step off the fence and get to know some people I deem worthy of my time.

So there. More happy stuff! YAY!